13 Comments

  1. Great post Molly! I once had a person I regarded as a good friend send me a gigantic email filled with what she thought was constructive criticism when I was in the middle of moving to a different state. There was nothing constructive in the email, it was just plain mean. The email not only ruined my day, but it ruined our friendship. We should all be able to take constructive criticism, but saying someone is “too enthusiastic” isn’t constructive. One of the toughest things to deal with on the job search is keeping any enthusiasm. If being enthusiastic makes you happy, keep it up!

    P.S. I had a grade school teacher tell my mother that I laughed too much. Seriously. Today, I realize my sense of humor is a strength of mine. Who wants to be around a “Debbie Downer”?

  2. Hey Molly,

    Here’s the problem with trying to dial back your enthusiasm, it’s fake, just like trying to dial it up.

    If you ask me who’s the cutest 2 year old, I’m going to explain that @finnbuckley is, and I will not be shy about it. Should I say it some other way? Should I couch it that maybe there are other kids who are just as adorable?

    Let it flow, sometimes it will be too much, but that’s okay. Sometimes you’ll be in a bad mood and your levels will be lower. Be yourself and you’ll attract the right people around you who will appreciate you AND your level of enthusiasm.

    You can’t make everyone happy, so make yourself happy.

  3. Both. I took my first improv class at UCB in NYC and did long form – I did ComedySportz for two years and now I do a short form show called ImprovSLAM at DSI Comedy in Carrboro, NC (http://www.dsicomedy.com). I did the Second City training center in NYC, too! I love long-form probably the most, but I like to treat long-form scenes like short-form and have as much fun as possible

  4. Both. I took my first improv class at UCB in NYC and did long form – I did ComedySportz for two years and now I do a short form show called ImprovSLAM at DSI Comedy in Carrboro, NC (http://www.dsicomedy.com). I did the Second City training center in NYC, too! I love long-form probably the most, but I like to treat long-form scenes like short-form and have as much fun as possible 🙂

  5. Great point! And I totally know what you mean when it comes to enthusiasm (and comedy) it’s all about the delivery. Your message has to be clear, concise, and deliberate. Granted, I’ve only done standup once (I’m actually an improviser) – but, nevertheless, the lesson is the same.

    Now, in my personal incident, it was more of an instance of me having to deal with a grumpy person who was trying to bring me down… I had to fight off the Debbie Downer. You know?

    But I think you really bring up a fantastic point! It’s all about the delivery and the presentation. Be enthusiastic, but not pushy.
    Thanks so much!

  6. I have to say I agree and disagree on this one. I’m all for enthusiasm, heck, we all know how painful it is to do things we aren’t enthusiastic about.
    However (and let me concede, I wasn’t there for your incident, so I don’t know the set up, I will instead speak on generalities), often times enthusiasm isn’t what frustrates others, it’s the presentation of enthusiasm. Allow me to give you an example: There are many people that are enthusiastic about their faith. The majority of those present that enthusiasm in manner respectful of others beliefs. There are some that choose to be very publicly enthusiastic and bring their enthusiasm to others without their request. What results is a feeling of discomfort for the individual on the receiving end of the enthusiasm (again, I’m not saying, or infering that this is what happened to you).
    Often times, regardless of the intent, it’s a failure of the presentation not the message that causes the issue.
    I’m super passionate about comedy as well, and I’ll share with you one of the great lessons I’ve learned: comedy is sales. You have to sell your joke (the punch anyway) to the audience. Not every audience is the same, so you may have to change your delivery based on the audience, but you convey the same message each time. Example, in clubs I’ve played in the north east the early show crowd is often older than the late show crowd. I may make slight changes to my pacing, use slightly different vernacular, or use different pop culture references based on that different audience. At the end of the day the laugh is the same, the message is the same, it’s only the presentation that’s different.

  7. Thanks so much for the comment. I’m glad you are in a similar boat. It is sad how sometimes we let those cynics into our heads and let them permeate our positive space. Kick ’em out! Keep ’em gone. Rock on, girl!

  8. Molly this hits so close to home! I too have received this exact same “constructive” criticism. It rocked my world and from time to time still permeates my thoughts in the form of doubt. So not OK! Such a shame that individuals view enthusiasm to be a negative. My enthusiasm comes partnered with passion, creativity, energy and success. I’m pretty sure yours does too! Onward and upward with our enthusiasm we will go on the ladder of success!!

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