This is My Real Life.
The internet world is a tricky world to spend time in. I find myself being pulled every which way at times, and often times I start to feel like my reality is being blurred. Or something. I’ve been very aware of this issue for a while, but it hasn’t been until the last few months or so that I’ve tried to be more intentional with how I spend my time online so that my OFFLINE (you know, REAL actual life) doesn’t suffer.
And I feel like I’ve definitely made great strides.
But it’s always hard because when you spend your time online… whether it be on blogs, social media (Instagram is the worst for this), or even in e-mail… it can be so hard to not sit and analyze and compare every last detail of your life… MY life to everyone else’s.
I do have to say I feel like I am pretty good, for the most part, at trying to curb the “comparisons.” That’s not to say that it’s not a struggle at times… it is. I compare my parenting, my marriage, my style, my self-image, my closet, my income, my church life, my photography, my blog design, my blog sponsorships or partnerships, my {INSERT ANYTHING HERE}. It’s a constant game of fighting comparison. 
I’m extremely self-aware… and I know that is a strength of mine, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t still struggle with things. Because oh boy, do I ever!
But one thing I want people who read this blog to know for certain is… every last bit of this blog is 100% me. I may not share every little nook and cranny of my life (that is clearly on purpose), but every bit that I do divulge, every opinion I make known, every product I review, every outfit I wear, every tip I share, whathaveyou, is 100% me. And the biggest compliment that I receive from a reader when they meet me in real life is, “You are EXACTLY how I imagined you! I can hear your voice when I read your blog!” THAT, ladies and gents, is a win for me.
I make no bones about the fact that sometimes I am just off the wall crazy. I make no excuses for my awkward jokes, lame puns, and general goofiness.
My life mantra has always been, “No matter how serious your life requires you to be, you always need someone to act goofy with.”
And that’s what I want to be. I want to be the person that you, or anyone, can always act goofy with. Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional.
The whole goal of this blog, at the end of the day, is that you can come here and forget about your own problems for five or ten minutes. You can think about something other than bills, life stresses, and the whatnots that weigh you down. I just want you to be happy for a short while.
But at the end of the “blog” day, it’s hard to not want to “appear perfect.” You know what I mean. You see the Instagrams and the blog posts with the images of perfectly coifed hair, beautifully arranged bouquets sitting on a desk with a coffee mug and a notepad with a pen sitting perfectly cattywompus on top of it with a to-do list that says things like “Save the world” and “Fight AIDS” and “Go to brunch with Caroline.”
Because the proof is in the pudding (or something), and people don’t want to read “mess” or “disorganization” – they want to read beautiful and clean. They want to see the show… the perfectly rehearsed performance… not the backstage frantic preparation and sweating. Am I making ANY sense at all?
I’ve mentioned before (a time or two) that I really do believe it’s all about balance. Sharing too much of one thing can turn someone off. If you’re “TOO PERFECT” all the time, then people will start to believe you’re fake. If you’re “TOO MESSY” all the time, people will say “Gracious, she needs to get it together.”
But ultimately, we have GOT to realize that we can’t make everyone happy. We can’t be everything that everyone wants us to be. And I realized a long time ago that I definitely can’t be all that everyone wants me to be. So I’ve had to learn to say “NO” to stuff (that is so. dadgum. hard.) and I’ve had to learn to shake off the “haterz” and “ignore the critics” and just keep doing me.
You’re probably thinking, “T-t-t-today junior… get to the point already.”
Well, a few bloggers and I are working together to try and “shatter,” if you will, the notion that we’ve got it all together… and we’re just sharing bits and pieces of our real, backstage, life.
So, while I try to be super-employee, super-blogger, super-mom, and super-wife… it doesn’t always turn out that way… so here are some things that are my real, un-filtered life:
- I hate doing the dishes. HATE IT with the passion of 1,000 buffalo. I will do everything I can to avoid doing the dishes.
- I hate having dishes in the sink. I don’t know which I hate more… doing dishes or having dirty ones in the sink. This causes me extreme inner turmoil. Thankfully my husband doesn’t mind doing the dishes… otherwise I’d probably lose my mind.
- Instead of ironing, I throw things back in the dryer in the hopes that wrinkles will come out. (I know I’m not the only one that does this.)
- I am a “generally” clean person, but my closet and my desk are SO HARD to keep organized. I do my best, but 8 times out of 10, my closet and desk are a disaster area.
- A few weeks ago, I was “wearing” Lilly in the baby carrier on a trip to Target when I suddenly felt a very warm sensation on my back. Yes, Lilly peed AND pooped on me in the middle of Target. Actually, I was in the back of the store. And I had a full cart of groceries. So I did what any mom would do… I went about my business, checked out, and went home… completely covered in baby stuffs. It was not pretty. I have since laughed about this whole ordeal very much.
- There have been a few days (NOT ALL DAYS, okay?!) that I have legitimately forgotten to brush my teeth until like noon. Some days, there just isn’t even enough time to brush your teeth.
- Showers are a luxury. No, but for real. They are. And baths? Oh dear Lord, baths are from heaven.
- I often start a book with every intention of finishing it… but more often than not, it doesn’t get finished. I probably have 40 books that I own that I’ve started but never finished… one day! ONE DAY I will!
Now it’s your turn. Share something that is personal from YOUR real life… use the hashtag on social media: #ThisIsMyRealLife. Share the button. Show people that it’s not always perfectly staged photos and clean lines. Sometimes, life gets real.
I LOVE this!!! That’s one thing I love about your blog is that you keep it REAL! I really appreciate your craziness! 🙂 Let’s be honest, life can get crazy at times so it helps to have a laid back attitude!
http://www.mylifewithaaron.blogspot.com
I definitely throw my clothes in the dryer. I don’t even own a clothes iron. haha Quite frankly, I prefer it. I don’t waste time fussing over whether clothes go into the closet unwrinkled, and it doesn’t take long to put it in the dryer – and I can get other stuff done in those few minutes, and they always come out fine. lol
Lol love the title and image combined together. You have always had such a fabulous sense of humor and I’m glad it continues into motherhood!! Also, I hate doing dishes too. Bleh.
Love it! I hate doing dishes and I can’t stand a sink full of dishes. I need a clean kitchen to cook so it’s a problem. I don’t iron, ever. My husbands work shirts are either a little wrinkled or done by the cleaners.
MOLLY! Hearts & love and YES I will do this because I have been pooped and peed on in Target, too.
It’s crazy how often your blog posts correspond with exactly what has been on my heart. I’ve been on a soul-searching journey they past few months to figure out how to simplify my life and live MY life – not my friend’s life, a blogger’s life, or a Pinterest account life. God has been teaching me so much about this, through many avenues. As this next year will be a huge year for me – with lots of exciting and scary endings and equally exciting and scary new beginnings – I think this is preparing me for what’s next. Or, maybe it’s just part of being in my late twenties (ugh, it kills me to say that!)
Thank you so much for your authenticity. It’s is truly refreshing! Also, your first four confessions are me – to a “T.” Except that my disdain for washing dishes always outweighs my disdain for dishes in the sink. haha.
Thank you Molly, you are an encouragement to me. My husband and I are taking the Financial Peace class now and I also appreciate your sharing about money…we both like to shop too much :(.
O my goodness so first of all I totally wrote a post about lowering our standards because social media is hard to live up to and not using the #momfail and so on, on my own blog today not even knowing you where doing a similar thing! Wow thats a run on sentence I’m sure…. Second, I must say that we would seriously be best friends in real life….is that creepy? Probably.
My real life is recruiting- I am a head hunter who has kind of lost the passion for it. It’s no fun calling strangers and asking them if they want to move to WI! ( that is the very simplified version of what I do) So, I read your blog to have that 5 minutes of fun and forget about the other stuff.
BTW…how about them Browns? Did you see Sunday’s game?!?!
LOVE this, Molly!! A lot of people’s Instagram accounts make me believe their life is so perfect, when it can’t be. My life isn’t perfect and my closet is always a disaster. Life shouldn’t be perfect though, that would be boring 🙂
xo,
Angela
I get this. Boy do I. Those immaculately filtered (literally and figuratively) Instagram photos and blogs depicting perfect, well, EVERYTHING can cause quite the inner turmoil. I know they are but snapshots of an imperfect life, but sometimes they have a way of oozing into the little emotional cracks that form when you’ve had a bad day, you’re jeans are feeling a little snug, and you wore two different socks by accident.
But there’s one thing I’ve noticed: those blogs and Instagram accounts slowly fade into the background. It’s been a very gradual progression, but the “unfollow” button has gotten clicked here and there until I find my blogroll and feed to be full of beautiful but relate-able content. There’s a reason your blog has made it through every personal revolution I’ve had over the past several years. You don’t feature a new Chanel bag every week, leaving us wondering how the rest of us are supposed to afford such luxuries in the real world. You talk about debt and marriage and parenthood in the way it should be talked about… you don’t leave your fellow mothers wondering why they can’t do it all when, in fact, nobody can.
Aspiring to more beauty in your life is a good thing. Until the comparisons begin. Theodore Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Does that ever ring true. I find that dancing to the beat of my own (blogging) drum has an added benefit: I attract like-minded people who want to have real discussions in the comment section. People who I can interact with in a genuine way.
Here’s to authenticity.
I love your blog, Molly! Keep up the good work! I often have wondered how you do it all- a special talent indeed.
LOVE this. Life most definitely is not always pretty! Thank you for keeping it real!
I love this! Just found your blog and definitely following now!
I read a tip somewhere that if you throw a wet towel in the dryer with your wrinkled clothes, then pull them out before the towel is completely dry, you don’t have to iron. So that is absolutely what I do all the time, I think my ironing board probably needs to be dusted!
Sometimes I worry about sharing the difficult times in my life because I feel like I’m tired of hearing myself whine, and worry that no one else will want to listen to that either. In fact I think I once lost a friend over my whining, so now I’m really reluctant to share when I’m struggling. But as a mother to a teenager and a pre-teen with ADHD, I frequently struggle and feel like a failure, and feel like whining. But I do try to keep it to a minimum on my blog so as not to scare readers away; though it is a balancing act with keeping it real.
You are such a wonderful person and I love reading your blog. Thank you for sharing your real life!