Learning to Say “No” (& Link-Up)
Leggings: LulaRoe black leggings | Bag: Lily Jade c/o | Choker and Earrings: Nickel and Suede | Cuff: Darzah c/o | Watch: Wristology Watches c/o (Use code “45” for 20% off)
You guys, I didn’t blog on Friday. Some of you are thinking, “Really? SO?” Well, the thing is, I almost NEVER skip a post. Ever. I’m a planner and I pretty much plan out all of my posts at least 30 days in advance. I’m crazy. It’s just how I work best…
And I had a post planned for Friday.
But life happened…
Sometimes, life happens. Sometimes, things get in the way. Sometimes I have just got to learn to say “Nope. I can’t do it. I can’t do it all.” And let go and let GOD. For the sake of my sanity, my family, etc.
I am not great at saying “no.” I’m a people pleaser by nature and I just, naturally, want to help everyone. I want everyone to be happy. I want everyone to like me. I want everyone to think that I’m helpful and dependable and loyal and all the things.
But the truth is, I’m not doing anyone any favors when I do that… because the more I say YES, the more I stretch myself thin and the less I can be helpful and dependable and loyal because I’m too overwhelmed.
To put it simply, I feel overwhelmed right now.
This is not a pity party, this is not me crying or asking for help… this is just me learning to identify my reality and not STAY in that reality. Because the longer I STAY in a state of overwhelmed-ness… the worse it’s going to get. I mean, being overwhelmed doesn’t just magically fix itself? It’s about learning to say NO to some things. It’s about learning to stop, breathe, relax, and give up control.
I’m working on it. It’s a process. I do not have it figured out. I know it will be okay. Sometimes, the simplest thing of skipping a blog post is what I need to kick myself in the butt and refresh and restart.
You know what I mean? Who’s with me on this? Do I sound like a crazy person or do you know what I’m talking about?
On a completely separate and unrelated note… I realize this outfit has nothing to do with my post topic today and that’s cool. Sometimes, wearing a totally comfortable, yet, trendy and edgy outfit on a day when you’re like, “I MIGHT LOSE MY MIND” does the trick for SNAPPING OUT OF IT. Right? Right.
Also, today’s my super hunky husband’s birthday and he’s the best and would be embarrassed to know I’m wishing him a happy birthday on the blog… but I don’t care. I do what I want. 🙂 Happy birthday, babe!! I LOVE YOU!!!!
Welcome back to our regularly scheduled program……..we just finished celebrating Let It Shine’s FOUR year anniversary with a month of giveaways….and now we’re back to business. Each week we share a few of our favorite posts from the week before….
Awesome post! I hear you… was in the same position back in summer (actually, still am..)
Yes! This is wonderful! So many women need to hear this – me included! I read Purpose Over Perfect over the weekend and it is all about this idea. If you haven’t read it yet, I think you would adore it. LOVE your blog.
<3 Traci
http://www.choosingbetter.net
Sometimes a break is much needed and I am glad you were able to do so and recharge. Cute outfit!
Rachel xo
http://garaytreasures.com
At some point NO is the best word to say! It’s a struggle I think knowing when to use it, but if you’re feeling completely overwhelmed definitely use it! Super cute outfit by the way!
http://www.mylittlenest.org
Molly you aren’t the only one who struggles with no. I think we all do at some point in our lives. Just know that you are not alone in this. Sometimes when we take days off or a break that is where our moments of clarity come to us. Redirecting us to something even better.
Aw girl, i SO feel you – i am such a yes person ( i hate saying no to people) so I get overwhelmed a lot. Good for you taking a day off the blog – it seems like such a little thing, but as a fellow blogger I know the work that goes into just one post (writing it, doing all the links, promoting it etc etc) so taking a day off can make a huge difference!! XOXOXO
Lee | LegalLee Blonde
I have a hard time saying no as well . . . as you get older I think you realize we all need to learn how to say it. UGH THE STRUGGLE
Life is just Rosie
Instagram
If you can learn to identify the yes that works and say no to other things as a young mom you are going to save so much heartache and stress. I remember someone saying to me once “your family should always be your first ministry”. Typically when I start to feel overwhelmed it usually means I have stopped treating them as such.
The older you get, the better you get to saying “no”. I could never say “no” when I was younger, now I know it’s essential.
I totally know how you feel, and I have trouble letting go too. I’ve been listening a lot to the Lively Show podcast lately and trying to be more in touch with my intuition and having more “flow” in my life–which means letting go and saying know when things feel forced. It isn’t easy and I think it’s something I will always struggle with, but giving yourself permission to do that feels so good sometimes. Take care!
Looking great! … loved your post ..as a self care advocate I am all about taking care of YOU first. And sometimes we need to say NO … you go girl … you are taking care of you!!
I love that tunic! And, girl, it is so true! Saying ‘no’ is hard, but sometimes you just gotta do it.
I’m pretty excited with this outfit I am wearing from my favorite Los Angeles brand TOBI – come on over at the blog & find out why! #shopTobi
Happy Monday!
Rebecca
http://www.redtagchiclosangeles.com
Gurl! Your totally right! We are not super heroes, we are humans so if saying no to something, helps you then by all means do it. As much as we want everyone to be happy, we have to love ourselves first 🙂
Love your post and thank you for hosting,
xo
Melissa
Hi Molly I’ve followed your blog for a while and enjoy it a lot. I heard moving from 1 to 2 kids is the hardest transition in parenting… harder than going from none to 1 or from 2 to 3+. You are awesome just being you (unconditionally)! Skipping things now & then makes for a happier you & happier children. You look gorgeous in these photos. Happy birthday to your hubby!
I am with you such that when I skip a post I totally panic. But as a mom of 2, I am def learning how to let certain things go and just focus on the things that really matters at hand, the things that I don’t want to miss (not what other people will miss). You look wonderful as usual Molly!
~ xo Sheree
Posh Classy Mom
Instagram
Thanks for hosting this link up! I’m a people pleaser too so I know how hard saying no can be!